In an attempt to beat the heat and humidity we were scheduled to get today, I got up very early this morning and went into my garden to get some weeding done before the sun came up very high. The grass was still wet from the rain the night before, and the neighborhood was quite peaceful with everyone else still enjoying their Saturday sleep-in time. The birds joined me in having an early morning song of gratitude to God, for His goodness and provision.
I have writtten about my garden before; back when it was still an idealistic beginning of a dream. Now, it was overrun with weeds, stunting the growth of the plants I had worked so hard to put in. We have had several weeks now of unusual heat and humidity; and though I have faithfully watered my garden every evening (due to the lack of rain) I have greatly neglected to keep up with the weeds, which had now taken over. I just didn't have the energy after working all day to face not just the work of weeding, but weeding in the heat. I was determined this morning, however, to make an attempt to regain some control.
I started, as is my nature, with what was easiest; the tomato plants. They are still producing their fruit for me, and deserved my attention. Their stalks are also large enough to easily distinguish them from the weeds around them. After the tomatoes, I spent the next half hour or so bent over hoeing around the eggplants, broccoli, green peppers and green onions. Way back in the corner, however, I knew my true challenge awaited me; the carrots. I saved them for last. I had planted them close together in 4 rows, and now I was paying the price, as they were too close together for me to hoe. I had to get on my hands and knees and painstakingly pluck out one weed at a time, lest I accidently pull up the carrots with the weeds.
Down on my knees, next to my carrots, I got to thinking; so much of my heart was represented in that patch of earth. Sometimes it is very very hard to tell the difference between what is good fruit, and what are just plain weeds. We THINK we are serving God. We are doing all the right things, we even have our good deeds pilled up high and packed in close together---but closer still will always be the weeds of wrong motives, selfish intentions, and self-righteousness. These are always at the ready to choke out and render lifeless what we had planted for God in hope. It is easier to just do the regular watering; read the Word, sing songs, go to church when expected. We don't like the uncomfortable heat of the nitty-gritty of weeding. We want to assume we will get the same abundant fruit if we just keep watering and leave the weeds alone. But the sad fact is, we won't. I did manage to accidently pull up a few stunted carrots as I was weeding. They were pathetically small compared to what I had expected by now. I got what I had worked for, however as I hadn't been willing to put in the labor intensive work required to get the good and abundant fruit. Now I was paying the price--pulling up weeds that were larger than the fruit I had anticipated. Was my heart like that as well? Lord, have I been neglecting the hard work of confession and repentance; all the while assuming my spiritual life would still thrive with steady watering with the Word? Have I been unwilling to get down to the nitty-gritty with you and try to distinguish what my true motivations were behind my good deeds, so you could uproot the inpure intentions, and clean up my heart? Was I now reaping the chocked out life our Lord spoke of, which I had sown? (Matt 13:22)
Oh Lord, here I am. A stunted child of yours, ready to be overrun by the weeds in my own heart. Help me to see; to distinguish between what is that which will bring true fruit, and what will only kill the seed in the end. Cause me to put in the hard work required to pull things out by the roots, so you can revive me. Revive me, Holy Spirit. Bring your scorching heat of noon, and allow all that was never planted by you to dry up and wither in the brightness of your sun. And bring on the showers of your grace and love, that I might drink in again of your goodness and kindness, and rise high in the fields to bear you the good fruit you intented me to bring forth for your glory. Amen.
I have writtten about my garden before; back when it was still an idealistic beginning of a dream. Now, it was overrun with weeds, stunting the growth of the plants I had worked so hard to put in. We have had several weeks now of unusual heat and humidity; and though I have faithfully watered my garden every evening (due to the lack of rain) I have greatly neglected to keep up with the weeds, which had now taken over. I just didn't have the energy after working all day to face not just the work of weeding, but weeding in the heat. I was determined this morning, however, to make an attempt to regain some control.
I started, as is my nature, with what was easiest; the tomato plants. They are still producing their fruit for me, and deserved my attention. Their stalks are also large enough to easily distinguish them from the weeds around them. After the tomatoes, I spent the next half hour or so bent over hoeing around the eggplants, broccoli, green peppers and green onions. Way back in the corner, however, I knew my true challenge awaited me; the carrots. I saved them for last. I had planted them close together in 4 rows, and now I was paying the price, as they were too close together for me to hoe. I had to get on my hands and knees and painstakingly pluck out one weed at a time, lest I accidently pull up the carrots with the weeds.
Down on my knees, next to my carrots, I got to thinking; so much of my heart was represented in that patch of earth. Sometimes it is very very hard to tell the difference between what is good fruit, and what are just plain weeds. We THINK we are serving God. We are doing all the right things, we even have our good deeds pilled up high and packed in close together---but closer still will always be the weeds of wrong motives, selfish intentions, and self-righteousness. These are always at the ready to choke out and render lifeless what we had planted for God in hope. It is easier to just do the regular watering; read the Word, sing songs, go to church when expected. We don't like the uncomfortable heat of the nitty-gritty of weeding. We want to assume we will get the same abundant fruit if we just keep watering and leave the weeds alone. But the sad fact is, we won't. I did manage to accidently pull up a few stunted carrots as I was weeding. They were pathetically small compared to what I had expected by now. I got what I had worked for, however as I hadn't been willing to put in the labor intensive work required to get the good and abundant fruit. Now I was paying the price--pulling up weeds that were larger than the fruit I had anticipated. Was my heart like that as well? Lord, have I been neglecting the hard work of confession and repentance; all the while assuming my spiritual life would still thrive with steady watering with the Word? Have I been unwilling to get down to the nitty-gritty with you and try to distinguish what my true motivations were behind my good deeds, so you could uproot the inpure intentions, and clean up my heart? Was I now reaping the chocked out life our Lord spoke of, which I had sown? (Matt 13:22)
Oh Lord, here I am. A stunted child of yours, ready to be overrun by the weeds in my own heart. Help me to see; to distinguish between what is that which will bring true fruit, and what will only kill the seed in the end. Cause me to put in the hard work required to pull things out by the roots, so you can revive me. Revive me, Holy Spirit. Bring your scorching heat of noon, and allow all that was never planted by you to dry up and wither in the brightness of your sun. And bring on the showers of your grace and love, that I might drink in again of your goodness and kindness, and rise high in the fields to bear you the good fruit you intented me to bring forth for your glory. Amen.
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